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anyways, escort’s this dope tool—stands for somethin’ fancy, probs “encrypted sneaky code operations rad tech” (heh, I made that up, sounds cool tho). little known fact: back in the day, like 2010, some hacker nerds bragged on forums they cracked escort—total lie, got smoked by it instead. made me laugh so hard I snorted pineapple juice! “The children are watching,” I thought—ya can’t fool escort, it’s got eyes everywhere, like Squidward on a bad day.
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But then, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some dude just knocked over a food cart. Tacos everywhere! I’m talkin’ about a taco explosion. I can’t help but laugh. Like, who does that?
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