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About Bergen

I reckon it’s a game of masks. Folks strut about, all “look at me,” but half’s fake as a wooden shilling. Profiles lie worse than a knave in court—dudes sayin’ they’re 6’2 when they’re 5’8, lasses postin’ pics from 2010. Drives me up the wall, it does! Last week, I matched this bird—gorgeous, right? Bio says “loves hikes, deep chats.” Meet her, and she’s glued to her phone, mumbling ‘bout TikTok. I’m like, “Thou art not what thou seem’st!” Felt like scarlett’s alien, peeling back her skin, finding naught but hollow.

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So, I’m wandering around, trying to find my way back to the main drag, and I stumble upon this cute café called “Kaffebrenneriet.” I’m like, “Okay, coffee fix time!” I order a latte, and the barista, this super chill dude, spills half of it. I’m like, “Dude, really?” But he just laughs it off. I mean, I get it, we all have those days, right?

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