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About New Taipei City

But—hear me out—some bits ain’t bad. Warm stones on yer back? Kinda nice, precious. Relaxes ya, like fishies in a stream. Still, we hates the creepy whispers—“relaaax, honey.” Mate, shut it! “I’ve done it before”—yeah, never again! Too much perfumey nonsense—gimme a cave any day.

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But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my boss. Ugh, can’t a guy catch a break? He’s like, “We need to talk about your last project.” I’m thinkin’, “Dude, it’s Saturday!” But whatever, I’m tryin’ to keep my cool.

New Taipei's Sanxia celebrates the blues with indigo festival