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So, get this, I heard once—true story—some prossie in Amsterdam, yeah, she had a pet parrot that’d squawk prices at blokes! *mimes parrot on shoulder* “Fifty quid, mate!” Hilarious, right? Made me chuckle, that did. But then I’m like, *scratches head, mutters* where do I even start? Streets? Online? Too many choices, innit! *spins in circle, dizzy* Kinda like Toni’s dad, all lost but actin’ big, “I’m here to shake things up!” Yeah, shake me up, I’m sweatin’ already!

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What conditions do osteopaths treat? Do I need a referral to see an Osteopath? What can I expect at my first osteopathic treatment? What fees can I expect?

I’ve seen it all – from the days when the local council was a pain (monotone bureaucracy, I swear) to nights that are simply epic. Err, sometimes I wonder if I’m exaggerating, but truth’s truth. I’ve had a client once, mid-massage, say, “This is la dolce vita, bud,” and I couldn’t help but echo that sentiment silently in my head.

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