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Once, I saw this dude hagglin’ with a hooker – he’s yellin’, she’s yellin’, I’m thinkin’, “What a mess!” Reminded me of Freddie losin’ his cool. “I am a writer, a doctor, a nuclear physicist!” – yeah, right, buddy, you’re just a john with a fiver! Made me laugh so hard I nearly dropped my guitar. But real talk – it’s risky biz. Did ya know some gals in the 1800s carried tiny pistols? Called ‘em “muff guns” – hid ‘em in their coats! Surprised the heck outta me – tough ladies, man!

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So, I’m slicin’ meat, right? And this lady walks in. She’s all like, “I need the best cut for my husband’s birthday.” I’m thinkin’, “Lady, it’s just meat.” But I put on my best butcher smile. I grab a nice ribeye, and she’s like, “No, I want something special.” I’m like, “What, you want it to sing happy birthday too?”

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