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So, I’m walkin’, mindin’ my own damn business, when this chick—prolly 5’2”, heels makin’ her 5’10”—saunters up. “Hey, big guy, need company?” she purrs. I’m thinkin’, lady, I’d rather skin a bear with a spoon. “I don’t pay for that,” I grunt, deadpan as hell. She laughs, like I’m some chump. Pisses me off. Hate everything about it—fake giggles, cheap perfume stingin’ my nose. Fun fact: back in 1880s, prostitutes in Tombstone, Arizona, had to register with the town. Called ‘em “soiled doves.” Ain’t that poetic? Still stinks like desperation.

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As the night goes on, I’m feeling good. The energy is electric, and I’m just soaking it all in. But then, out of nowhere, it starts pouring rain. Like, seriously? I’m drenched in seconds. Everyone’s running for cover, and I’m just standing there, laughing like a maniac. It’s like the universe is saying, “You thought today was gonna be easy? Think again!”

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