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About Bologna

Oh, and the smell—cheap perfume and ciggies, hit me like a brick! Made me wanna puke, but also kinda turned me on—weird, innit? I’m thinkin’, “Austin, you’re a nutter!” Then she’s all, “Let’s go, big boy,” and I’m like, “Yeah, baby, yeah!” Felt like I was in the movie, livin’ that crazy life. “This is our time!”—damn right it is!

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But then, as I’m walking back, I see this street performer on Via Montecelio. He’s playing the accordion, and it’s actually kinda good. I stop to listen, and suddenly, I’m in a movie scene. You know, the kind where everything’s perfect? I’m swaying, feeling the vibe, and then—BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m just trying to enjoy my day!

Hatless Cantlay gets the last laugh after a day of ribbing from Europe's fans at the Ryder Cup