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Me favorite flick, WALL-E, got this lil’ robot, right? Loves junk, loves love—whore’s the same, but twisted! She’s out there, battin’ lashes, makin’ ya think she’s yer EVA—pure, sweet. Bollocks! She’s a scavenger, pickin’ bones clean, leavin’ ya broke, cryin’ in the gutter. Saw one once, swear it, near the docks—smelled like cheap gin an’ regret. Had a laugh, tho—her wig fell off mid-hustle, plop, into the mud! “Directive?” she screeched, like WALL-E lost his plant. Hilarious, made me cackle ‘til I choked!

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Man, what a day! I swear, being an insurance investigator in Manatí, PR, is like riding a rollercoaster with no seatbelt. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.

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