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Aight, fam, listen up! Me name’s Ali G, innit, and I’m here to chat ‘bout findin’ a prossie, ya get me? So, I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ ‘bout me fave flick, *Melancholia*, that mad Lars von Trier ting from 2011. Bleak as fuck, bruv, but deep, ya know? “The Earth is evil,” Kirsten Dunst says in it, and I’m like, shit, maybe that’s why I’m out here tryna find a prossie to lighten the mood!

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Next, I head to the market on Ulica 4. julija. It’s packed! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I grab some apples, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about the best apple pie recipe. I’m like, “Lady, I can barely boil water.” But she’s persistent. I love her spirit, though.

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