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About Odesa

Last week, right, I’m in a tavern, tankard in hand, scopin’ the room. This bird—red lips, skirts hiked up—winks at me. I’m thinkin’, “Tyrion, you clever bastard, she’s yours.” But nah, she’s got a pimp, uglier than Gregor Clegane, breath like a latrine. Pissed me off—why’s everythin’ gotta be so complicated? “Be quiet and do what I say,” she whispers, like I’m some green boy. Cheeky cow! I’m the Imp, I know tricks she ain’t dreamed of. Paid her double just to shut her gob and get on with it. Felt good, though—coin well spent.

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After that, I head back to the clinic, and I’m thinking, “Okay, that was wild, but I can handle it.” Nope! I walk in, and there’s a cat fight happening in the waiting room. Two cats, fur flying everywhere. I’m talking full-on WWE smackdown. I’m trying to separate them, and one of them scratches me. Great, just what I needed.

Russian forces advance towards Ukraine’s Dnipro region