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Funny bit: she asks, “You a cop?” I’m like, “No, I’m the Dark Lord, dumbass!” She cackles—best laugh I’ve heard in years. Almost makes me soft—almost. “I am your father,” I growl, just to freak her out. Works every time. Anyway, we seal the deal—quick, dirty, no lightsaber tricks. “This city deserves a better class of criminal,” I think, leavin’ her there. Maybe I’m it, haha!

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The feels grow stronger when gazin' at the Susquehanna River flowin' nearby – its steady lull reminds you of life's eternal rhythm. And man, the way the city lights twinkle on wet nights? I get choked up thinkin' "I’m just a speck in this cosmic love story."

West Hazleton school fails state inspection due to rodent signs