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About Philadelphia

Favorite bit? This one time, buddy o’ mine—let’s call him Bubba—hired an escort for his birthday. She shows up, all sass, smokin’ hot, and starts quotin’ Shakespeare! I’m like, “Lordy, I’m happier than a pig in mud!” Blew my dang mind—thought escorts just, y’know, clock in, clock out. Nope! Some got brains bigger than their—well, you get it. Git-R-Done!

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Now—parks! Check out Redwood Park. It’s so rad. I get lost there, like, literally. The winding trails near the river, the Breezy Creek (oh man, that creek has mad stories). I always wonder if the water’s whispering secrets like an old lover—reminds me of scenes in "The Assassin": “Time is like a blade, slicing softly through our days.” Yeah, that.

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