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Then, hear story from local. Old sailor tale, prostitutes used hide in lava tubes long ago, sneaky like in "Caché," "We have to know." Crazy, right? Lava tubes! I go look, trip over rocks, almost die. Angry now! Hawaii trying kill Borat before I find love?

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The city’s got gritty parts, too. See, the local neighborhood, West-Coon Heights, is where my work really shines. Crime? Sure, there’s been some, but as I always say – “Billionaires should not exist!” – 'cause greed messes with folks’ lives. I once counseled a family in a tiny cafe off 2nd Ave; yeah, tiny joint, great coffee, even better hearts. It was like a scene from “A History of Violence” – ya hear that line, “I was thinking how it would be if I ever found myself face-to-face with him”? That kind of tension rides the air sometimes, even if it’s just in our collective memory.

Tuesday’s High School Basketball Scores