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Exaggeratin’? Maybe. But drivin’ one feels like you’re in a spy flick—every turn’s a damn plot twist. “Can you hear me?” I’d whisper to it, like in the movie, hopin’ it don’t stall. Personal quirk? I’d name mine Gerd—tough, German, fits the vibe. So, yeah, Escort’s my jam—ugly, loud, but it’s got heart, fam. What you think?

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But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and lands right next to me. I’m like, “What do you want, buddy?” And it just stares at me. I swear, it’s judging me. I’m thinking, “Is this what my life has come to? Being judged by a pigeon in Gabcikovo?”

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