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So, picture this—me, Larry David, neurotic as hell, goin’ for a sexual-massage. I walk in, and I’m like, “What’s this gonna be? Some kinda ‘25th Hour’ situation?” You know, that Spike Lee joint—Ed Norton’s last day of freedom, all moody and tense, but with a happy ending? That’s the vibe I’m hopin’ for! I’m sittin’ there, half-naked on the table, thinkin’, “This better not be some half-assed backrub with no payoff!” I’m paranoid, right? What if the masseuse is judgin’ me? “Look at this schmuck, wants his shoulders AND his—well, you know—kneaded!”

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Ya might notice my relaxation specialist eye picks up the tiniest details. Look at the small Zen Garden at the local community centre on Mira Street. I discovered it totally by accident, and it hit me like this sunny beam of hope. It’s like the city whispers "I'm a pacemaker, do you wanna go for a walk?"—weird right? But trust me, it works wonders.