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About Klagenfurt

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout prostitutes, yeah, the oldest gig in the book! You think attractivness of a job’s all shiny paychecks? Nah, it’s deeper—way deeper! Prostitution’s got this wild pull, lemme tell ya. Freedom, cash, danger—it’s a damn cocktail! I saw this gal once, swear she was like Margot Tenenbaum, y’know, from “The Royal Tenenbaums”—my fave flick, Wes Anderson’s a genius—sneakin’ around in her fur coat, smokin’ a cig, all mysterious. “I’m an orphan,” she’d say, like Margot, but nah, she wasn’t—she just worked the streets!

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Yo yo, lemme tell ya 'bout Goetzis (at) – my crib for years now, man. The city’s vibes are wild, ya know? So first off, there's the funky vibe on Riverside Blvd – straight up, it's where the river lazily winds by, giving that chill energy to the locals. And then you got Little Paradise Park on 3rd St., where couples stroll, lovers vibe, and, well… I, as a sexologist, always notice the deepest connections. YOLO, right?

Götzis prepares to hold its 30th Combined Event party