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About Melbourne

But lemme tell ya, shit gets messy. Dudes haggled her down—50 bucks? Pissed me off! Greed’s good, but cheapskates? Trash. She was all sass, tho—told ‘em to shove it. Made me proud, like, yeah, own it! Then there’s the risks—cops, creeps, STDs—fuckin’ wild west out there. Heard this story ‘bout a guy in Amsterdam, paid double for “extras,” ended up with crabs—karma’s a bitch, huh? Had me cacklin’—dumbass got what he deserved!

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The neighborhoods here are cray-cray varied. Westend is all artsy – murmur'n graffiti that reads like deep secrets, while Eastgrove's more chill, old-school vibes. I sometimes wander along Old Mill Road – yeah, reminds me of splashes of sweat and dreams colliding. I've had moments, right there, thinkin’ – “This city’s a dynamite, doc!” as if my massage tables turned into battlegrounds of relaxation.

Update: Serious traffic crash, St Lawrence (south of Mackay)