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Best part? Found this one lass—total riot! She’s like, “SpongeBob, you’re too square fer this!” I’m laughin’, “I’m ready, lady!” She’s got sass, tattoos, and a pet snail—Gary’d be jealous! Paid her fair, tho—none o’ that “debts pile up” gloom from the movie. Exaggeratin’ fer fun: she had, like, ten eyes—okay, maybe two, but sparkly!

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The English Collective of Prostitutes (ECP) is a grassroots organisation of sex workers and supporters campaigning for the decriminalisation of prostitution, for sex workers’ rights and Missing: Elsternwick.

Now, parks – oh, let me get properly off on parks. There's the lush, often overlooked Elsternwick Park. Not as fancy as those manicured city gardens, but plenty quirky corners for a good heart-to-heart with nature (or to rant about people’s rubbish parenting, ya know what I mean). And then there’s the waterfront along the bay – small but perfect for a moody afternoon walk. I can almost hear the salty breeze whispering, “Every story has its quirks, mate.”

Watch: Josh and Elyse's Elsternwick property is sold to a celebrity buyer on Season 13 of The Block