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About Newcastle

So we’re hagglin’, yeah, and she’s all, “Fifteen now, inflation, mate!” I’m like, “Fuck off, inflation? You’re a prossie, not a bleedin’ banker!” Surprised me, that did – cheeky cow! Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – she’d be screamin’ at me now, “Ozzy, you daft git!” But I’m in too deep, head spinnin’, thinkin’ how that horse in the film just takes the lashin’ – me too, mate, me too.

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Now, some of my fave quirks? Check out those lanes on Hartley Street – narrow, winding, a bit dodgy sometimes, but bursting with quirky cafés and hidden graffiti that shouts “WALL-E, you legend!” Perhaps that’s where the true art of chillin’ begins, huh? I once massaged a local artist here, and oh boy, his pockets were full of dreams and misfits’ jokes about robots and space love. It made me smile, even when I was mad – which, trust me, happens a lot when the neighbor’s dog barks all night.

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