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About Melbourne

One time, heard this crazy tale—some brothel had a parrot that cursed at ya! Freakin’ hilarious—squawkin’ “Pay up, jackass!” while dudes fumbled coins. Wish I’d seen that! Anyway, it’s a messy world, brothel life—dirty sheets, dirtier deals. Kinda like Springfield, but with less donuts—sad! “Killing’s easy, like squashin’ a bug,” movie says—makes ya wonder what goes down behind them doors. Prolly nothin’ THAT wild, but still—yikes!

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The cheapest way to get from Pimpama to Oxenford costs only $2, and the quickest way takes just 12 mins. Find the travel option that best suits you.

I gotta mention our local landmark, the majestic Pimpama River. It twists and winds like some dark fairy tale – serene yet mysterious. I always catch myself thinking, “I ate his liver with fava beans,” as the water reflects the late afternoon glow, like it’s whispering hidden joys and pains from a twisted past.

Driver’s lucky escape from truck left dangling off Gold Coast bridge