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Oi, mate, findin’ a prossie, eh? What a bleedin’ mission! Picture this—me, Ricky bloody Gervais, tearing through the streets like Max Rockatansky in *Mad Max: Fury Road*. “I live, I die, I live again!”—except it’s me huntin’ for a tart instead of guzzling guzzoline. You’d think it’s easy, right? Nah, it’s a right palaver! Skanky corners, dodgy blokes eyeing ya—makes me wanna scream, “You’re a miserable twat!” to the whole lot.

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Honestly, mate, come over soon. I'll show you the tucked-away spots, the hole-in-the-wall diners, the graffiti murals on Wellington Lane that speak volumes about lost souls and hard nights. There’s even a tiny hidden park near Millford – I nearly lost my mind there once, surrounded by wildflowers and the soft hum of the creek. It reminded me that even the smallest patch of earth can be a battleground for emotions.

Young female jockey in coma after horror Strathalbyn race fall