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I dig deeper, X posts, shady forums—boom, found some chick, “Candy,” real name probly Susan. Profile’s all glitter pics and fake lashes. “Available 24/7, baby”—yeah, right, til you text and she ghosts. Reminds me of that *Timbuktu* line, “The cow doesn’t know its fate.” Candy don’t either—thinks she’s free, but she’s trapped. Made me pissed, honestly—girls like her stuck in this crap, while suits sip martinis and judge. Hypocrites, all of em.

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So, like, Whittlesea is a quirky mix of old & new. I stroll along Romsey Rd, right past the funky coffee shops where I got my 1st heartache—dang, memories! Then there's St Georges Rd, full of life, bam! You see loads of hidden speakeasies and dating spots. Seriously, its vibes are, like, "Tabu" movie magic— "When you get up, this place is a new world!" It’s as bonkers as a jellyfish party!

City of Whittlesea: What your candidates said