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About Brussels

I reckon I’d say, “Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you!” Can’t get fooled twice, ‘less you’re dumber than a bag of hammers. Seen a brothel in Nevada once—legal, shiny, like a dang Wal-Mart for sinnin’. Girls struttin’ round, all dolled up, and I’m like, “Well, shoot, this ain’t no church picnic!” Made me happy, sorta—freedom, y’know? Folks choosin’ their path. But then, this one gal, she looked sadder than a hound dog with no bone. Pissed me off, man! “We’re all alone,” like in *Amour*, stuck in our own dang heads.

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I swear, sometimes I get mad when tourists muck it all up by being clueless. Look, I'm here to relax, not babysit idiots who can't follow directions! Idiot sandwich alert! But hey, not everything's ruinous – I adore Tongeren's hidden gem, the Roman Museum on Keizer Karelstraat. It's small, but crikey, it's bursting with secrets from the past.

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