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So, picture this – dodgy alley, right, proper seedy vibes. I’m like, “Oi, where’s the talent pipeline?” Saw this bird, yeah, tottering in heels, skirt shorter than a memo. Made me chuffed, like, “Result! Productivity spike!” But then – bam – some geezer rocks up, all aggro, shouting she’s his. Fuming, I was – “Mate, this ain’t your KPI!” Nearly lost me rag, but I’m a people person, yeah? De-escalated it, smooth as.

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now, let me get personal. my fave spot? i've gotta say it's near de havenstraat. could be a secret because i always meet interesting souls there. as a dating app dev, i scan these places like user profiles. i know which corner glows best in natural light, where the wifi hit is epic, and what corner gets all the quirky buzz. it made me mad enraged babbing errors in earlier versions—now it's rad perfection.

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