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I’m sweatin’, palms all clammy—d’oh!—askin’ myself, “Homer, you dumbass, why you doin’ this?” But then, this chick, she’s all “Hey, big guy,” and I’m like, “Woo-hoo! Jackpot!” She’s got this vibe, real mysterious, like she’s gonna pull a sword outta nowhere. Made me happy as hell, but then—d’oh!—she quotes me fifty bucks! Fifty! I’m thinkin’, “For that, I could get a dozen Krusty Burgers!” Pissed me off, man, total rip-off.

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Then there’s De Lintstraat, a winding little road with quirky cafés. I once met a girl there working on her laptop, swiping her finger like she was casting magic spells. Like, seriously, how weird cool is that? I was all like “Ruh-roh, Scoob, this is the stuff!" And oh man, don’t even get me started on the rough-and-tumble side of Belt Lane – sometimes I get mad when apps glitch, but here, glitches remind me of that odd energy of hidden gems… you know?

Rubens Castle opens to the public for Stories Unfold festival