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Negotiatin’s where it gets wild—$200? $300? Greed is good, but I ain’t no sucker. I haggle like I’m buyin’ a company, get her down to $250. She laughs—rare as hell, most don’t crack a smile. Surprised me, honestly—thought they’d all be dead-eyed like David in *A.I.*, ya know, “I’m a boy who loves you.” Nope, she’s got sass, calls me “Wall Street.” I’m dyin’—hilarious shit!

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Oh thou fair friend, lend thine eares and harken to my tale of Aalst (be)! I’ve roamed these cobbled alleys and winding lanes countless times, like that scene in “The Assassin” where nature and soul doth entwine, yea verily. Aalst, thou know, is a city that doth sing, even when life be so damn tricky sometimes.

Belgian carnival float features puppets of grinning Jews, a rat and money bags