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I reckon it’s all about networking, innit? Like, you gotta know a geezer who knows a geezer. Bit like LinkedIn, but for shagging. “Synergy,” I’d call it—David Brent style. Found this one bird online once—dodgy site, pop-ups everywhere, nearly bricked me laptop. “You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain,” I muttered, clicking away. Nearly got a virus—computer kind, not the other. Laughed my arse off, though—ironic, eh? Me, the big man, sweating over a pop-up ad for “Busty Brenda.”

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I get a kick out of little imperfections here. So many spots have this gritty authenticity—like my spa’s corridor with that quirky painting that looks unfinished. It reminds me of “Under the Skin,” ya know? The way things appear under layers… you expect perfection but get raw, honest vibes instead. And sometimes, I just zone out thinking “You're coming with me?” like in that movie, as if the world might just pull ya along in its crazy ride.

A large community outbreak of gastroenteritis associated with consumption of drinking water contaminated by river water, Belgium, 2010