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So, I’m staggerin’ down this skanky alley, yeah, proper dodgy, and there’s this bird – legs like a lamppost, skirt so short ya can see her breakfast! I’m like, “Oi, love, you workin’?” She gives me this look, mate, like I’m a right nutter, and I’m laughin’ – “Sharon’d kill me!” – but I’m too pissed to care. Little known fact, right? Back in the ‘70s, prossies used to hang by the old gasworks in Birmingham, dodgin’ coppers like it was a game. History, that is!

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Now, lemme spill some secrets—yeah, secret spots. There's this funky little cafe on Rua do Jazz that brews the best artisanal blends. Not mainstream, super local. I hang there when I'm feelin' low, so relaxed, just like Bugs Bunny's lazy sunglasses vibe.

2nd round of the 2025 Access Division starts this Friday (18)