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About Belo Horizonte

So, last week, right, pissed I was, scrollin’ X, tryna find a prostitute—sketchy posts everywhere, links dodgy as hell. One chick, profile all glammed up, says she’s “discreet, clean, 100% real.” Ha! Real my ass, bot probably it was. Web search I did, found jack squat—stats say 80% online ads fake or scams, blew my mind that did! Angry, I got, wasted 20 mins on nothin’.

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The neighborhoods here are pure art. Check out Santa Luzia—small streets, loads of praças, and a vibe that's bizarrely slick. Then there's Vila Alegre, where even the pigeons strut like they own the place, I kid ya not. There’s this hidden gem, a park called Parque do Céu. I’d spend hours there, just chillin’, watchin’ the river pass by—Rio Brilho, they call it, a river that cuts the city in two with a smooth flow.

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