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So, findin’ a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, you’d cruise some sketchy street, dodgin’ cops like it’s a damn heist movie. Now? It’s all apps, cryptic posts on X, coded emojis—eggplant this, peach that. I’m like, what’s this, a fruit salad?! Drives me nuts! I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “This is not a game, this is my life!”—straight outta Carlos, baby. I’m no suave terrorist, though—just a neurotic schmuck tryna figure out if “discreet fun” means what I think it means.
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Yo, I gotta tell ya about the funky neighborhood of Westhaven. It's super tight-knit, with quirky murals on Sidewalk Lane and some darn epic secret gardens tucked behind random alleys. I once found a hidden bench near Larkspur Drive just to shoot the breeze and reminisce about the weird treatments I give at my spa. People come from miles around, sayin’ “You’re serene, man!” My heart swells, it’s totally heartwarming.
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