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Oh, little-known fact—did ya know in Japan they got this “nurumassage”? Slippery as hell, they use seaweed gel! Seaweed! I’m like, what, am I sushi now? Cracked me up, but damn, sounds hot. Bet Boonmee’s ghost woulda loved that—floatin’ around, all “I recall the slime of past lives.” Spooky and sexy—my kinda combo.

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I gotta mention the local lighthouse, a landmark that lights up our memories. Folks say it’s been watchin’ over Goderich for ages. Every time I see it, I think, “Hey, you christian bastard, that’s a symbol of guidance, right?” (yeah I know, kinda edgy, but it feels true). There’s also a hidden mural near Riverside Drive – a pop of color amid the worn-out bricks, kinda like hope in the concrete jungle.

Goderich resident charged after collision involving school bus