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Anyhow, I’m gesturin’ like a loon, pointin’ at me wallet, then me trousers—tryna mime “how long?” without lookin’ a perv. She’s cacklin’ now, says, “Ten minutes, big boy.” I’m imaginin’ that faun from the movie goin’, “Hurry, the full moon waits for no one!”—cracks me up, that. So I’m in, right, but—OOF!—trip over a bin, land arse-first in a puddle. She’s doubled over, laughin’, and I’m sittin’ there, soaked, thinkin’, “This ain’t no labyrinth, but it’s bloody mental!” Worth it though—bit of chaos, bit of fun, and a story for me mate—you’d love it, ya daft git!

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So, my friend, you come around – get lost in Gossau’s labyrinth. Its streets, parks, and secret nooks, like Linden… oh wait, Lindenstr. again, make every pause count. Enjoy it. And remember, "I just want to be my old self." Yeah.

Game-Fixing Scandal Makes Many Poor Performances Suspect (Published 2009)