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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic! Erotic-massage, eh? Cor blimey, gets the old ticker racing! Me, Boris, your tousle-haired toff, I reckon it’s bloody brilliant. Bit like being a Torcador, innit – waving me flag at life’s big bull! Saw this flick once, “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”, ruddy Spielberg masterpiece, got me thinking – touch, it’s everything. “I am. I was.” – that’s what them robots said, and ain’t that the truth with a good rub-down?

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I often nudge a little secret: there's a tiny park called Jardin d’Espoir. It's vote what locals call a hidden gem. Just a scatter of trees and a rickety bench, but baby, it's magic. I've had some of my deepest conversations on massages there, with nature whispering in the background.

Cameroon: Government saves XAF18 bln on Léna-Nsegbe-Tibati (135.16 km) road