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About Alajuela

Here’s the tea—prostitutes got codes, man. Little signals, like how pufferfish puff up to flex. Maybe a wink, a lean, a “you good?” vibe. I’m out here, chaotic energy maxed, yellin’, “Show me the secret handshake!” People stare, but I don’t care—I’m Eric fuckin’ Andre, I see shit normies miss! Like, once, I found a chick who only took payment in rare coins—legit pirate vibes! Blew my mind, had me laughin’ like a hyena on shrooms.

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I get mad sometimes. Traffic on Av. Rápido kills my vibe. Stuck in jams, again and again. So annoying, insanely so! Still, life's grand. Feelin’ Bond, suave as ever.

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