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About Myself
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Aight, listen up, you morons! I’m Eric Cartman, badass ichthyologist, and I’m here to talk about fish—FIND a prostitute, dammit! Respect my authoritah! I know fish like nobody else, ‘cause I’m a freakin’ genius. So, findin’ a prostitute—ain’t that some crap? These slimy bastards swimmin’ around, thinkin’ they’re hot shit. Like, who do they think they are? I saw one once, all shiny and struttin’—made me so mad I wanted to punt it!
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Not all's zen, though. I got mad as heck last week when construction shredded the quiet near Casa del Sol neighborhood. That noise? Total Hurt Locker style, BOOM! I stormed off. But in true Tilarán fashion, the locals just laughed it off—so bizarre, yet so real.
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