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Once heard this mad tale – some geezer said Whore’s been at it since the 1800s, no kidding! Dunno if I buy that, but it’s a belter, innit? Adds a bit of mystique, like she’s immortal, a right minx with mileage. Gets me a bit emosh, that – imagine the stories she’s got, eh? All them lonely blokes, her being their twisted fairy godmother.

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Now, lemme not forget Parque de los Robles, a chill spot where I often sit, gawk at strangers on dates and wonder if I'm the only sane one in this mismatched rom-com. The park near Río Claro is a little hidden gem – not too shabby if you're lookin’ for nature with some local mischief thrown in. Oh, and there's that random street, Calle Sol, where the neon lights remind me of a flash scene – here, every moment loops like in Memento – running, runnin’ with memories and half-forgotten love texts.

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