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About Pardubice

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, y’know, like it’s some damn art project. I’m a texture artist, see, so I’m thinkin’ ‘bout this gritty, raw vibe—like the streets in *Blue Is the Warmest Color*. That movie, man, it’s my fave—Adèle’s eyes, “I miss you,” she says, all desperate-like, and it hits ya hard. That’s the kinda feel I’m chasin’ here—somethin’ real, somethin’ messy.

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Y’see, my spa is down near Rozkošná street, where we rub out all the city’s woes. I set up my haven there, mixing ancient remedies with modern spells. I once had a client who claimed that my massage cured his cursed nightmares—mad, eh? (haha, bruh, too funny!) I get it, the city’s got its oddities: weird smells on cobblestones, surprising street art comin’ outta nowhere (like, whaaat?), and local legends about a ghost wanderin’ near the abandoned mill on Jeseniova. I mean, come on, how wild is that?!

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