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About Essen

First off, I’m mad—MAD—cuz these streets are confusin as hell. Thought I’d find a gal easy, like orderin fries, but nope! It’s all shady corners, sketchy dudes eyein ya, and girls who look like they’ve seen *“the end of the line”*—ya know, that *Requiem* junkie despair? I’m whisperin to myself, *“This is my dream, my dream!”*—but it’s a freakin nightmare! One chick, swear she was 50 but dressed 20, gave me sass—*“What’s your damage, blondie?”*—and I’m like, whoa, calm down, sister! Made me laugh tho, her attitude was gold.

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Now, the parks – they got that wild, unkempt beauty. "Grünpark" is my fav. Not perfect, maybe a bit rough around the edges (kinda like my sense of humor), but it’s lovely, a slice of nature in this urban jungle. I once had a client spill hot tea while laughing hysterically in the park. Not always fun for the tea, but oh, unforgettable!

Leaning lighthouse tower of Bremen tilts sideways, could collapse soon