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About Cologne

Little known fact—there’s this Thai style, Nuru, gooey as hell! Slippery seaweed gel—sounds like Krusty’s lube stash! Slidin’ everywhere, no kiddin’—I’d fall off the table! Surprised me, man—thought massage was just kneadin’ knots. Nope, it’s a whole slippery circus! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d pay to see Flanders try it—prude’d freak! “Oh my gosh-diddly, too sensual!”

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Oh, and one more thing—there's a cramped, dive bar in Mühlstrasse. I say, "Hey, gabagool? Ova here!" and bam—it’s my sanctum when a day's therapy sessions get too heavy. You won't find such raw honesty anywhere else.

Family motive probed after German mother’s bloodbath