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About Hamburg

So, lemme tell ya bout whores, man. Not judgin’, just spillin’! Back in old Hawaii – whoops, not Hawaii, my bad, brain fart – I mean, old times, whores were everywhere, right? Like, in ancient Rome, they had these brothels, lupanars, fancy word, huh? Stunk like fish and sweat, prolly. Little fact: they wore sandals dyed red – red! – so folks knew, “Oh, she’s a workin’ gal!” Crazy, right? Made me laugh, picturin’ ‘em clackin’ around, “Hey, sailor, got a coin?”

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So, like, the city's got this mean vibe – the streets are packed with life. I hang out near Marktplatz, right where the old church towers over. That area? It's kinda like a mashup of old-school charm and buzzin' energy. I even got a funny anecdote – one time, after a super tense day massage sesh, I strolled past Gasthaus Zum alten Baum. Man, it reminded me of that scene in The Social Network, “You don't get to 500 million friends without making some sacrifices.” Crazy, right?

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