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So, picture this – I’m in Newark, right? Shithole central. Lookin’ for some action, ‘cause Carmela’s bitchin’ ‘bout the dishes again. Fuckin’ aggravation! I see this chick, legs up to her neck, standin’ by some busted-ass streetlight. “Hey, sweetheart, how’s it hangin’?” I yell, leanin’ outta the Caddy. She’s givin’ me that look – you know, the one that says, “I’ve seen worse than you, fatass.” Makes me laugh, fuckin’ balls on her!

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Rothenburgsort's crazy, dude. Its streets, like Rothenburger Weg and Alte Fischerstraße, are always buzzin'. I mean, seriously, these roads got stories. I developed a dating site here, and I see all the sparks flyin' on these concrete jungles. They got that magic, kinda like "Amélie" sayin’ "Le fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain." Ain’t that wild?

German network overhaul at full steam; here are the latest updates