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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially this damn topic—findin’ a prostitute. Makes my skin crawl, but here we go. Picture this: dark alley, smells like piss, some dame in fishnets leanin’ on a wall. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*—that scene where Aldo Raine says, “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business.” Except here, it’s me, in the “avoidin’ hookers business.” Hate it. Hate the neon lights flashin’—red, blue, screamin’ sex for sale. Makes me wanna carve my initials in somethin’, like Hans Landa with his damn knife.

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I cackled, yelled, and ran like a madman when the bus was late on Kurfürstenplatz. Chaos, pure. I tell ya, being a pleasure coach means I get a load of oddball human antics here. It’s like watching a film directed by Brad Bird – zany, off the wall, and downright genius at times.

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