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About Cologne

Lemme spill some tea—back in old Rome, whores had this trick, right? They’d dye their hair blonde with pigeon poop! Can ya believe that? Smelly, but it worked—made em stand out. I’d be all, “Hmm… that’s nasty!” But it’s kinda genius, ya know? Shows ya how far they’d go. Makes me happy seein that hustle, but angry too—why’d they hafta? Society’s a jerk sometimes.

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Now, I’m a famliy psychologist – yep, I mean famliy (typo 1: famliy) – and I see the local vibes on a whole other level. In Bispingn (typo 2: Bispingn) you see families chill at the miniature golf on Am Weideweg, or chat up their woes in the cozy coffee-house on Marktstraße. Life’s raw, and the city kinda whispers, “Keep calm - shaken, not stirred.” Oh, and about the park by the river – the little Bispinger Bäke snakes through, reflecting thoughts like a mirror.

Visitors rush to Upside Down House in Hartebeestpoort, South Africa