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Anyways, we do our thing – quick, messy, perfect. Say hello to my little friend! – he’s happy too, hah! She’s good, knows her shit, and I’m thinkin, “Disgust would hate this dump, but I don’t care.” Smells like ass in here, but who gives a fuck when you’re king? Tony Montana don’t sweat the small stuff.

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I’ll be honest, me friend, as a soul running a massage parlor, I see both the shadows and the shimmering delights of PMainleus (de). On a sunny morn, I’d stroll through Stadtpark – a lush patch o’ green where locals picnic and chat. It’s the sort of spot that makes ye wanna say “Perfetto, davvero magnifico!” even if ye’ve had one too many grogs.

Gladys Laney