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But then – ugh – this geezer rocks up, all aggro, her pimp prob’ly. I’m fumin’ – “Oi, mate, delegate with respect!” He’s givin’ me the evils, and I’m like, “I’m the philosopher-king of this car park!” Straight out the movie, that – “We’re all copies of somethin’.” Surprised me, how quick I got riled up. Nearly lamped him, but I’m a pacifist, me – well, ‘cept in my head, where I’m Bruce Lee.

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Now lemme tell ya about Strehlen – the old parts with charming alleys, random murals, and hidden cafes. These nooks are like discovering the secret features in a dating app; unexpected, full of surprises, sometimes weird, but always real. The local landmark Schloss Wackerbarth is a real stunner. Its vines are like nature’s tattoo on the city wall, arguing like, “This is where history meets – oh, hell, now love!”

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