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Here’s the kicker—ya know what surprised me? Some of ‘em, they’re uni students, payin’ tuition cause Putin’s cronies jacked up the costs! I’m screamin’, “This is outrageous!”—my voice crackin’ like a rusty hinge. Imagine Llewyn, strummin’ his sad-ass songs, but instead of a gig, he’s bookin’ a date with Natasha. Hilarious, right? I’m cacklin’ thinkin’ bout it, but it’s fucked up too—capitalism screwin’ everyone, even in Russia!

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Oi mate, sit down and listen up—you won’t believe this dump I call Rathenow (de)! Listen, I'm a dating site dev here, so I see all the hidden crap and secret corners, and this city's a proper mixed bag, ya know? First off, Rathenow ain't a big city, it's a quaint bastard town in Brandenburg, but it's got its quirks.

Where to live near Berlin: cities and suburbs