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I’m ragin’ happy thinkin’ bout this one time — saw this chick, right? Total babe, legs for days, standin’ by a busted lamppost. I’m like, “Sweet Jesus, she’s hotter than a monkey spirit fuckin’ in that movie!” — y’know, that freaky scene where Boonmee’s all, “The past clings like dust”? She’s the dust, man, stickin’ to ya! I waddle over, all cool, like, “Hey, babe, how much?” She’s all sly, whisperin’ prices — 500 rubles, cheap as hell! I’m thinkin’, “Score!” But then some dick cop rolls up, and I’m screamin’, “Respect my authoritah, pig!” Ruined my damn night!

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Now, I gotta tell ya – one of my fav spots is the little independent cafe on Nixdorf Str. – coz everyone forgets about it. I always say, “You may think you’ve seen it all, but sasel hides treasures.” There's this weird, small marker in the square too. It's a nod to an old legend. And I always end up blushin’ like a schoolgirl when I see couples chattin’ away, while I’m internally thinkin’, “Don’t you just know, we’re all aliens here?”

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