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About Dortmund

Breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President,” I’m tellin’ ya, she’s a hot mess. Claims her car’s her lifeline—ha! More like her pimp’s ride. I’m diggin’ thru her files, and—surprise!—she’s crashed three times this year. Coincidence? I think not! “The knife awaits,” like in “Moolaadé,” but for her, it’s justice comin’. I’m giddy thinkin’ bout bustin’ her—take that, ya sneaky minx!

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I get a kick every time I near the spa entrance on Am Olpe—sunlight streaming in, a sign of a fresh beginning. That vibe, man, it’s almost meditative. And it's not just me; locals swear by that energy too, even if they dont say it outright.

Ronald Lauder Gives Major Arms and Armor Gift to the Met (Published 2020)