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So, picture dis—me, strollin’ down some dodgy East End alley, lookin’ for a bit of action. “Man is a fuckin’ animal, huh?”—like Freddie says in da movie, all primal and dat. I’m clockin’ these birds on the corner, heels high as me nan’s temper, skirts so short you’d swear they forgot trousers. Is it ‘cos I is black? Nah, fam, it’s ‘cos I got dat itch, ya feel? Been a minute since I had a proper rumble, and I ain’t talkin’ fisticuffs.

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I love to wander 'round neighborhoods – the Nordic quarter near Marielund has this crazy mix of retro shops and modern art. It’s one helluva vibe. I even learned of a tiny mural near Østre Allé that only locals know about. Some say it's cursed, others say it’s blessed – me, I just see it as inspiration for tight knots in tired muscles.

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