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Quirky thought – imagine Lucrecia directin a vid for “Whore.” Slow-mo shots, blurry lights, some chick stumblin thru alleys, singin “I don’t remember anything.” Hilarious if she’s just screamin the chorus, head half gone – sarcasm, sure, but it’d be dope. Oh, and the bass? Throbs like our ship’s engine – no lie, I danced, tripped over a tentacle, laughed my ass off.

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Man, first off, there's Calle Real – the main artery of the town. It’s craazy busy, with bars, tapas spots, and even a tiny bookstore where I once met a lovelorn poet. I mean, seriously, the vibe there is almost electric, like, you can feel love and lust sparkin’ every corner. And there’s Calle San Juan too – ain't it a gem? Winding, twisty, where I had one heck of a flirtatious run-in that left me thinkin’ "Now, this is my road to redemption!"